Our society rarely talks about evil. There’s little discussion of morality, and even less of its opposite — wickedness. As a result, we don’t know that evil sociopaths exist, so we don’t know to protect ourselves from them.
I can’t tell you how many times people told me, while relating their awful stories of being deceived and betrayed, “I didn’t know people like this existed.”
They do. So why is there no discussion? Why don’t we know about evil sociopaths?
I can think of two reasons, one related to cultural change, and the other to confusion about terminology.
Cultural change
When I first started my career in the early 1980s, the term “politically correct” came into vogue. The idea was to avoid language that might be offensive to particular groups.
Politically correct language has continued to evolve, covering more and more sensitivities, to the point that now criminals are referred to as “justice impacted individuals.”
In this environment, few have the courage to say that some people are fundamentally evil.
Evil, according to Charles Mathewes, associate professor of religious studies at the University of Virginia, is defined as something that is “intentionally and willfully against the moral order.”
The American Psychiatric Association defines antisocial personality disorder as “a pervasive pattern of disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others.” (I’ll get to the connection between antisocial personality disorder and sociopathy in a minute.)
These definitions are almost identical. Therefore, I think it’s fair to say that people who have a pervasive pattern of disregard for the rights of others are evil.
Realm of religion
Unfortunately, we stopped talking about evil generations ago.
I listened to Mathewes’ lecture series on Why Evil Exists, presented by the Great Courses. He traced the understanding and interpretation of evil throughout history, and it was fascinating.
For thousands of years, the primary discussion of morality and evil occurred in the context of religion. So Mathewes discussed the concept of evil in the Hebrew Bible, Christian Scripture, Islam and theology. He also discussed secular philosophy, Karl Marx, the American Civil War, Freud and the events of 9/11 — probably the most shocking example of evil in recent memory.
Today, religion isn’t as central to life as it once was. Even among congregations of the faithful, there’s less discussion of hellfire and brimstone than there is of love and compassion. And in discussions of morality, we may argue about what is right, but we don’t acknowledge that some people have no problem doing what is wrong.
This is the cultural change — we don’t speak about evil. Instead, we hear messages like, “We’re all created equal,” “Everyone has good inside,” and “We’re all God’s children.”
Those of us with the capacity to authentically love are willing to live according to those tenants, but we’re not told about the people who don’t. As a result, we don’t know evil sociopaths exist — until they turn our lives upside down.
Lovefraud’s definition of a sociopath
Lovefraud’s definition of a sociopath is a person with a serious personality disorder in which he or she manipulates and exploits others.
When I talk about “sociopaths,” I’m defining the word as it was originally intended. When the term was coined in 1930, it meant “anything deviated or pathological in social relations.”
So on Lovefraud, I use “sociopath” as an umbrella term for people who could be diagnosed as having antisocial, narcissistic, borderline, histrionic or psychopathic personality disorder.
I am fully aware that this doesn’t quite match how the word “sociopath” is used among many mental health professionals and psychology researchers. But I believe my use of the word is more useful and less confusing than the official versions.
Why? People with these disorders exhibit similar behavior — they are all manipulative and exploitative towards us. Even people with borderline personality disorder, many of whom are that way because they were sexually abused or shamed, can make our lives miserable.
The point is, we don’t necessarily need to know the precise diagnosis of a particular sociopath in order take precautions. We need to protect ourselves from all of them.
Confusing terminology
Mental health professionals, however, don’t tell us this. In fact, the lack of clarity about naming and diagnosing personality disorders contributes to our ignorance.
Read more: What’s a sociopath?
The American Psychiatric Association’s first edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) listed a condition called “sociopathic personality disturbance.” People diagnosed with the disturbance were called sociopaths.
The second edition, however, got rid of “sociopathic personality disturbance” and replaced it with “antisocial personality disorder.” So now, “sociopath” has no clinical definition at all.
Clinicians who use the word “sociopath” interpret it to mean someone who has antisocial personality disorder, as defined by the DSM.
Psychology researchers, on the other hand, use the term “psychopathy,” which is similar to, but not identical to, antisocial personality disorder. Hundreds of research studies have been conducted using the diagnosis of psychopath according to the Psychopathy Checklist Revised (PCL-R), developed by Dr. Robert Hare.
Dr. Hare once proposed including “psychopathy” in the DSM, but that didn’t happen, mostly for political reasons. So psychopathy is not an official diagnosis either.
The bottom line is that the names and diagnostic criteria for these disorders is a mess, and we are clueless.
Evil among us
Depending on which studies you look at, 6% to 17% of the population of the population could be diagnosed with one of the personality disorders that I include under the umbrella of sociopathy — antisocial, narcissistic, borderline, histrionic or psychopathic personality disorders.
For simplicity’s sake, let’s take the midpoint and assume that about 12% of the population are sociopaths. In the United States, that would mean we live among 31 million sociopaths.
We’ve all been going about our lives oblivious to the fact that millions of people in our communities are willing to manipulate and exploit us — perhaps causing us great harm. Our world view does not include the fact that evil sociopaths exist.
The reality of evil
This is why the experience of being betrayed by a sociopath is so devastating — we had nothing in our frame of reference to prepare us for the reality of evil. Learning that evil sociopaths exist when one of them has betrays us is a total shock to our systems.
Now that we know, we have to change our world view.
Before the sociopath, we may have reflexively followed the Golden Rule — “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” We believed everyone had good inside, we all want to be loved, and everyone deserves a second chance.
Now, we know that there are exceptions. Now we know that about 12% of the population are evil. They do not authentically love. Their intention is to manipulate and exploit us.
So we can’t simply follow the Golden Rule anymore. With every individual, we need to determine if we are dealing with someone who can be believed – or an evil sociopath. Then, we treat them accordingly.
The hard truth is that evil sociopaths exist. Knowing this, we can protect ourselves.
Learn more: Tools for navigating narcissists and other manipulative people
