I overheard a conversation a couple of days ago in a men’s clothing store between three guys. I will fully admit that the topic of conversation caught my attention, and I intentionally dropped my eyes. I probably would have taken my mini-notepad out and started taking notes if that hadn’t been too obvious. One of them was there to buy something to wear on a blind date.
The three of them were discussing what could go wrong on that date, which rapidly turned into a conversation about what women do that irritates them. I am going to paraphrase a bit, but I am going to give you a peek inside the brains of three single guys who appeared to be pretty smart. They also all three seemed to want to find Miss Right, but shared insights into the things women inadvertently do that irritate them.
Here are ten things women don’t realize they do that make men irritated:
1. Expecting him to be responsible for your emotions
Mladen Mitrinovic | Shutterstock
Men do not want to be responsible for our emotions. Most of all, men do not want to be responsible for how a woman feels about herself.
Women may expect men to make them feel pretty due to a combination of societal conditioning, cultural norms that emphasize female appearance, and a deep-rooted desire for validation and feeling desired. A study by the Pew Research Center found that this can sometimes manifest as seeking external affirmation from partners through compliments and gestures that highlight their beauty.
2. Wanting him to think exactly like you do
PeopleImages.com – Yuri A | Shutterstock
Men do not want to be pressured to adopt their women’s opinions. They want to think what they want, like what they want, and be free to be who they are.
Women may want their partners to adopt their opinions, at least to some degree. This signifies a level of understanding, respect, and shared values within the relationship, fostering a stronger connection and sense of partnership. This can be especially important when discussing equality, personal growth, and shared decision-making.
However, it’s important to remember that not all women want their partners to mirror their opinions completely. Healthy relationships involve open dialogue and the ability to disagree respectfully, according to research from The Center for American Women and Politics.
3. Expecting him to include you in everything he does
Just Life | Shutterstock
A man likes a woman who can be independent. Better yet, a man likes a woman who has a lot of fun in her life without him.
Women often want men to include them in everything because this signifies a deep level of connection, respect, and a feeling of being valued and considered an essential part of their partner’s life. It demonstrates a desire for shared experiences, open communication, and a partnership in which their opinions and perspectives matter.
4. Being inflexible
fizkes | Shutterstock
Men like a woman who can go with the flow. Even more so, most men like a downright spontaneous woman.
Research published in The Journal of Consumer Research suggests that men often appreciate spontaneity. Spontaneity can be linked to excitement, novelty, a sense of adventure, and a feeling of being in the moment, which can be particularly stimulating in romantic relationships. Some studies even indicate that men may be more prone to spontaneous desire than women, potentially due to biological factors related to testosterone levels.
5. Hating your body
Dusan Petkovic | Shutterstock
If you have hang-ups about your body, men don’t want to hear about them. Men might not always show evident excitement when a woman expresses dislike for her own body because body image issues can be complex. They often stem from a combination of factors, such as not fully understanding the depth of her insecurity, feeling uncomfortable addressing body image concerns, or simply not knowing how to respond in a supportive way.
6. Using your physicality as a weapon
Motortion Films | Shutterstock
Men don’t see physical intimacy as complicated, and they hate it when women make it convoluted. A study published by The Counseling Psychologist on women using physical intimacy as a weapon is a complex and nuanced topic.
Exploring the motivations, dynamics, and societal factors contributing to this behavior, the study highlights that it can manifest in various ways, including using flirtation or implied threats of physical intimacy to control or gain power over another person. However, it’s important to note that this behavior is not exclusive to women and can be utilized by individuals of any gender.
7. Talkng too much
Mladen Mitrinovic | Shutterstock
That one goes without explanation. Research by the American Psychological Association (APA) suggests that men may be less attracted to women who talk excessively due to a combination of factors related to perceived dominance, social cues, and evolutionary psychology.
This indicates that a balance in communication is generally preferred in romantic relationships. However, it’s important to remember that individual preferences vary greatly, and not all men dislike talkative women.
8. Refusing help
Prostock-studio | Shutterstock
A man really does enjoy taking care of a woman. When she refuses any assistance it indicates to him on some primal level he isn’t wanted.
A 2010 study suggests that women often hesitate to ask men for help due to a combination of social conditioning, fear of appearing weak or incompetent, concerns about being perceived as burdensome, and a desire to maintain autonomy. These factors lead them to prioritize self-reliance over seeking assistance, even when needed.
9. Being emotionally erratic
fizkes | Shutterstock
Men do not know how to respond to an emotionally erratic woman. I gathered that usually, all they needed was a warning.
Something like, “You know, I’m not feeling great today.” However, uneven emotions without warning cause the springs in a man’s brain to start uncoiling.
10. Having no idea what you want
Perfect Wave | Shutterstock
Men are not mind readers. The only way they should know what a woman wants is if she’s told him.
Indecisiveness can irritate men because it can be perceived as a lack of agency, responsibility, and confidence, according to a 2021 study. This can often lead to frustration, as men feel in limbo while waiting for a partner to decide. This can be incredibly frustrating when planning activities, making important choices, or simply moving forward in a relationship.
Lisa Hayes C.Ht. is a law of attraction relationship coach and author. She specializes in helping people get the love they want, no matter where they are in their lives.
