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The holidays can be stressful for anyone—but what happens when that stress becomes overwhelming

Maybe your anxiety hits the roof as you’re anticipating a family gathering; maybe you and your spouse always get into fights when you’re trying to make holiday plans. But no matter what kind of support you need in the holiday season, there’s an online therapy service that can help.

Here are our recommendations for online therapy for any kind of problem that may arise during the holidays, as well as tips on how to make it through this challenging time of year.

Best for Talk Therapy

Do you find that, as the holidays approach, you wish you had someone to vent to about the upcoming stress? Look no further than Talkspace, an online therapy company that has been around for over a decade. Talkspace can set you up with a licensed therapist who can help you tackle all your negative feelings about the holiday season and work with you to develop a plan that will keep you calm and collected no matter what.

Best for Anxiety and Depression

Whether you find that your anxiety levels crank up to 11 around the holidays or your mood tends to get especially low as the weather gets colder and it gets dark earlier, Brightside can help. With a special focus on treating anxiety and depression, your Brightside therapist can teach you tools with which you can lower your anxiety and manage your depression, no matter what comes up during even the most fractious family gathering.

Best for Couples

Are you tired of fighting with your spouse over holiday plans? Couples counseling service ReGain, a subsidiary of BetterHelp, is a great place to turn to for help with your relationship. Attend sessions with your partner (even from different locations) and work with a therapist who specializes in couples and relationship therapy so that you and your other half can work together to strengthen your relationship in the face of holiday stress.

Best for Kids

Holidays can be an especially stressful time for children—seeing people they don’t normally see, being expected to be affectionate with people they don’t really know. Little Otter can help your little one deal with the stressors of the holidays by working with your child and you as a family unit to teach them coping skills and help you learn how to best support your kid. 

Best With Insurance

For many, the holiday season means extra expenses and tightening your belt to afford all the extra costs of presents and travel. This might mean you have less to spend on your mental health. Don’t worry—that’s where Teladoc comes in. By accepting a wide variety of insurance plans that cover online therapy and psychiatry services for the whole family, Teladoc makes mental health support accessible and affordable.

How to Handle the Holidays on Your Own

While seeking professional mental health support is always preferable, sometimes—especially during the holidays, when everyone (even therapists) are taking time off—you’re going to be left to your own devices. So, how can you deal with the stress of the holidays when you’re on your own?

Set Boundaries

If you’re worried about unwelcome attention or questions from family members—we all have that aunt who asks when you’re going to have a baby or points out that you don’t reeeeeeeally need that second Christmas cookie—set boundaries early and often. Let your family members know what topics are off-limits and what they can expect from you if they don’t respect those limits. 

Then, follow through. “No, Aunt Betty, I told you that if you brought that up I would stop the conversation, so that’s what I’m doing. See you later.”

If this doesn’t do the trick, always remember that if things get really bad, you can leave. Whether this means taking a break in a bedroom or peacing out from the party altogether, taking care of yourself is more important than meeting unrealistic expectations from your family, especially if they’re the ones causing problems.

Take a Break

Finding yourself frustrated or otherwise activated during a family get-together? Find a quiet place you can go and do some deep breathing. This will lower your heart rate and let your nervous system know that you are not in danger, which will in turn lessen your anxiety. 

You can also do a grounding exercise, like focusing on the things around you that you can see, hear, and touch, or a body scan, where you check in with every part of your body to find and release tension.

Can’t break away from the crowd? No worries—you can do some timed breathing (breathe slowly in for four counts, slowly exhale for six) anywhere quietly and discreetly. 

Check In With Your Friends

If you suspect you’re about to have a rough time with your family during the holidays, talk to your friends beforehand. Let them know you might need to check in with them to keep yourself sane, and offer them the same support from you. Knowing you have a lifeline out there in the real world can keep you (somewhat) sane.

The same goes for if you are not spending the holidays with your family. Use this time to connect with friends so that you don’t feel lonely. Have a “Friendsgiving” or throw your own holiday party with your chosen family. This can help ward off the holiday blues.

Final Thoughts

Whether you decide to seek professional help for the challenges you encounter during the holidays or you need help going it alone, we’ve got you covered. 

Talkspace is a great introduction to talk therapy; Brightside specifically treats anxiety and depression; and ReGain couples counseling can help you and your partner get along better during stressful holiday times. Little Otter is great for kids and families dealing with holiday stress, and Teladoc makes online therapy more affordable by working with a wide range of insurance plans. Any of these companies are a great option for online therapy support during the holidays.

There’s also plenty of ways to deal with holiday stress by yourself. Set boundaries with your loved ones to protect yourself from unwanted attention, take time to slow your roll and calm yourself down if you get upset, and make the most of support from your friends. 

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By Hannah Owens, LMSW

Hannah Owens is the Mental Health/General Health Editor for Verywell Mind. She is a licensed social worker with clinical experience in community mental health.



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