New mothers have their fair share of challenges to navigate, providing around-the-clock care to their babies on little sleep as their bodies recalibrate from giving birth.
They deserve all the support they can get, but as one mom discovered, not everyone believes that they should catch a break.
A woman was ‘harassed’ by her boomer co-worker after taking 18 weeks off for maternity leave.
She shared her experience in a since-deleted post on the r/work Reddit thread, explaining that she just returned to work after giving birth in February.
“I took the maximum benefits that my state allows,” she said. “I live in New Jersey, so we have pretty good benefits. I took 6 weeks for the birth of my child [and] 12 weeks on bonding.”
While there’s no federally mandated paid parental leave in the U.S., some states offer more benefits than others, and New Jersey is one of those states.
According to the New Jersey Department of Labor and Workforce Development, the state has two programs that provide financial assistance to expectant mothers and mothers after they have their babies.
A mom-to-be can apply for Temporary Disability while pregnant, which would give cash benefits to pregnant women before birth and after birth to support their recovery. They can also apply for Family Leave for Newborn Bonding, put into place after the recovery period so that parents can experience that crucial one-on-one time with their new babies.
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This particular mom was granted 18 weeks off, and her older co-worker had a strong opinion about her access to paid leave.
“This woman always asks me what benefits I received and if I got paid for it. I answer her that it was state disability that paid me,” the mom said, but that didn’t stop her co-worker from sharing her real thoughts.
“She proceeded to tell me that she shouldn’t have to pay for me to ‘sit at home and do nothing’ while she works because she’s 64 years old and she wasn’t able to get those same benefits when she had children 20 years ago,” the mom said. “I told her that is unfortunate, but times are different now, and new laws have been implemented for new parents.”
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But the boomer colleague doubled down and “started to get political,” expressing her belief that “the government shouldn’t pay for people to sit at home.”
“I told her that I didn’t sit at home and do nothing while I was caring for my newborn child,” the mom said. “I’m literally not her or anyone’s enemy because I had a baby.”
The mom, who’s a full-time employee, revealed that the other woman works part-time, “and her husband makes a lot of money. She always brags about the things that they have and how much money she gives her two grown children.”
The mom was “so disgusted” with her behavior that she separated herself from the situation by moving to a different desk in the office.
This wasn’t the first time that her boomer co-worker bullied her about taking leave. She also made mean comments while the woman was still pregnant.
The new mom wasn’t sure what steps to take, noting, “I don’t want to cause more drama, but I really feel disrespected.” She updated her post to share that she brought the issue to her director and supervisor, who advised her to contact HR.
The boomer colleague’s reaction fits the generation’s mentality that because they didn’t get adequate support, no one else should, either.
In the comments section, a Boomer mom weighed in, offering an alternative opinion.
“I didn’t have anything 30 years ago either, but I’m extremely happy this much-needed paid time off is now available,” she said. “It’s an important time in your family’s life!”
A father came to the thread to share his viewpoint on boomers, saying, “So much of that generation wants to pull the ladder up behind them.”
He captured an essential truth behind so many boomers’ outlook on life, an outlook that denies younger generations access to the same benefits they’ve received.
The boomer colleague’s reaction could easily be a trauma response, but that’s no excuse for her causing emotional harm to a new mom, who’s just trying to show up for her family within the confines of what our country offers her.
Time is anything but static, and laws should change, especially laws that were damaging or didn’t provide adequate protection to people who needed it.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango’s news and entertainment team. She covers social issues, pop culture, and all things to do with the entertainment industry.
