Are you a goddess? No, are you? Before you decide one way or the other, let me explain the qualities a woman with goddess energy embodies. First, having goddess energy is not about your appearance, your sense of humor, your level of intelligence, or your bank account.
Yes, it’s important to take care of your looks, laugh at life, and improve your knowledge of various subjects; however, goddess energy is about emotion.
Here is the specific energy type the most attractive women possess:
1. Goddess energy isn’t about surface qualities
When you focus all your energy on looking a certain way or trying to impress someone (“Hey look how pretty, smart, fun, and sweet I am!”) you aren’t deepening the connection you share with other people.
Think about goddess energy like a handbag. Yes, you can go out and buy a fake Gucci, but how long is the knock-off bag going to survive? Sure it looks great and you paid less for it but that bag is hardly worth much.
When you focus on surface things, you end up attracting people for a short while — for about as long as the fake Gucci purse will last you.
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2. Goddess energy is about feeling grounded
To have goddess energy, your feet and heart must be firmly planted in the ground. No matter what someone is doing or not doing, you aren’t scared of losing them and being alone, as supported by the Journal for the Theory of Social Behaviour.
Of course, it hurts when people pull back or act indifferent. Of course, you want to reach out to them. But women with goddess energy feel their feelings, let those feelings pass through their hearts, and continue to make choices from a dignified and self-loving place.
Instead of calling the drifting and disinterested person to “make sure they aren’t mad at you” or texting them “just to send a friendly hello” or emailing because you saw something online they’d love and should know about. Stop and embody your goddess energy and allow the impulse to pass. Goddesses don’t reach out to people who don’t reach back.
How to not act on impulse
Goddess energy is all about doing the opposite of acting impulsively and compulsively to pull someone toward you. To stop these urges, you need to feel grounded in the earth and among the stars in the universe.
3. Goddess energy is about having an open heart
Staying grounded means nothing if you have put up emotional walls. Goddess energy is all about being fluid, and that means no walls. The Journal of Social Psychology helps explain how emotional walls make you stiff and brittle physically and emotionally. They keep people from knowing you, and if they can’t know you, they can’t love you.
Until someone knows you, they will only love an idea of you. The problem with a person loving a fantasy of you is that sooner or later, you will disappoint them. You are human not a fantasy. When you show your whole self, something happens and suddenly you are loved for your flaws. That’s when a real emotional connection takes place.
The best way to remove walls is to have personal boundaries. What will you not accept or tolerate in a relationship? When you know these things and stand up for yourself when the lines have been crossed, you trust yourself.
When you trust yourself, you are open to others because you have faith that you can take care of yourself no matter what, as explored in a meta-analysis of trust. This is goddess energy.
To share your boundaries, make it very simple. Say, “I feel angry and don’t want to feel like you are flirting with other people.” Then don’t say another word. With an open heart, look at them and wait for their response.
If they backtrack, make excuses, tell you they aren’t ready to be committed to you, etc., say, “This is how I feel, and need to take care of myself right now so I don’t get angrier.” Then go do something by yourself that makes you happy.
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Here are three things that give a woman goddess energy:
- She’s grounded
- She’s open
- She’s strong
Go to the mirror and look at yourself. Take a moment to feel your feet on the floor and how they connect to the earth, open your heart, and say, “I know who I am and won’t accept anything but love and respect, which I will also give to you.”
How did that feel? How did that look? Were you frozen and numb in your body? Were you seeping with anger? Were you trying to minimize the pain with laughter and a cynical tone? Were you crying with deep despair?
Say it again and try to be as soft, tender, warm, and loving as possible. Feel all the same feelings, but don’t try to hide them, try to let these feelings turn into love. Try to smooth over the tension in your face and allow your eyes to meet your own eyes in a long and caring stare.
Imagine you are tenderizing your reflection and seducing yourself with loving, open, inviting, hypnotic, all-trusting, all-giving goddess energy. Don’t reach out or try to soothe your reflection with a hand gesture. Stay grounded in your spot and don’t come toward your reflection. Send love without moving forward.
Do you see the difference? Do you see how you are magnetizing without doing anything to come toward them? Do you see how much more loving and safe you appear? Which version of the speech would compel you to apologize and make good on your mistake? Which version would inspire your love?
Kristina Marchant is a writer and author with a BA in psychology from Barnard College at Columbia University. She is also a relationship coach who advises women on men and healthy relationship skills.