When I retired three years ago, one of the things I looked forward to the most was having the energy to pursue my latent writing passion. The allure of being free from my career’s stress and time constraints called to me like the siren’s song drawing ships into a harbor.
And that harbor didn’t disappoint. After selling our home and buying a 21-foot trailer, we hit the road and have had some fantastic experiences. From observing bull elk bugling and fighting at dawn to visiting many breathtaking National Parks, we’ve been living our dream.
However, as the months rushed by, we traveled less, deciding to split most of our time between Washington State and Florida, where we had the pleasure of living with some great friends for several months each year.
This past winter, it dawned on us that we’d unwittingly established a stable, predictable routine for ourselves. Though we weren’t dissatisfied with how things were, we weren’t entirely happy either. I spent my days writing and editing while my wife worked part-time at a high-end outdoor clothing store and cooked for the household.
We began feeling discontented and a bit stagnant, which made us question whether we needed to chart a new course. When we made our way back to Washington State in May, we quickly decided a radical change was in order, and five days later, we moved into a 55+ apartment community.
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As we settled into our new living situation, we continued to dialogue about how we wanted to spend our retirement years.
I’m grateful to be married to a partner who values tough questions and authentic answers. We trust each other enough to be honest about our desires, even if it might be challenging for the other person to hear.
We talked transparently about our hopes and fears and whether we were settling for a practical and predictable existence to ensure that our retirement savings would last as long as we did. While evaluating our current mindset, I realized we were safeguarding our investments rather than experiencing the joy of retirement.
Instantly, I was transported back to October 2019, when I received the call telling me my friend Scott had left this earth. A few days after his death, in a conversation with Scott’s husband, I heard about the incredible retirement plans they created together — plans that Scott never enjoyed.
Thinking about losing Scott with a fresh perspective gave me pause. There were questions I needed to answer to ensure that my focus was on enjoying the time I had left for as long as my health allowed: How do I want to live the rest of my life? What do I value, and how will those values be expressed? I have pondered these questions for the past few weeks. Do I esteem safety and predictability above all else? Should we let our fear of outliving our money dictate our decisions? Will we be disappointed by our choices at the end of our lives?
Are we willing to take some risks to fulfill the things I dream about? There were so many questions to consider. As we answered them, a curious thing happened.
