Friendships are vital for life satisfaction. However, making new friends can be difficult. Whether starting college, a job, or moving to a new neighborhood, navigating relationships is a challenge.
Sometimes you will meet a person and experience an instant spark of understanding between the two of you. At other times, your intuition will warn you to proceed with caution.
Starting classes at a college or university provides people with multiple opportunities to meet new people. Some will be vital short-term acquaintances, while others may become lifelong friends.
From an immediate perspective, “a sense of belonging involves a student feeling like part of a particular community just the way they are, not having to conform to a particular set of forms. Being part of a university, feeling accepted, and being included, is important to university engagement.” (Dost, 2023)
Friends are a positive presence
Using data from the multipurpose Italian survey “Aspects of daily life,” it was noted that “a high life satisfaction is indeed associated with the presence of friendship. As suggested by previous research, friends provide companionship (in addition to more social trust and less stress), intimacy, and help, which increase an individual’s life satisfaction.” (Amati, 2018)
Whether at school, work, or in a new neighborhood, seek to make friends through organizations—from study groups to joining an arts council, business association, fitness center, music group, volunteer organization, or political group. Meeting people with whom you share interests is the basis for a solid foundation.
Avoiding difficult relationships
Researchers noted that what prevented people from making friends included low trust and a lack of time as well as introversion. (Apostolou, 2020)
From your perspective, you might sense red flags in a friendship if you find yourself:
- Guarding information you might otherwise share.
- Groaning when you see their name on caller ID.
- Considering the need to ghost them.
- Finding excuses when asked about getting together.
Despite the research and academic advice, when I posed the question of avoiding difficult relationships to my 16-year-old granddaughter, she quickly answered:
- You don’t have to be their best friend, but you still have to be respectful. If you have to work with them on a project, only talk about the project.
- Don’t project hate or spread rumors.
- Only Interact when you must on a collaborative project.
- Distance yourself as much as possible.
- Simply walk away if they begin to upset you.
Workplace and campaign friendships
Since COVID-19 many workplaces adapted to a remote environment. The downside included isolation and loss of spontaneity. Nonetheless in this election year, working on a political campaign is an engaging way to meet new people who share your values. Whether it is door-to-door introductions or sharing “Get Out the Vote” postcards, this is camaraderie with a purpose.
Volunteering for a campaign brings you together with people of all ages who have stories to tell and who want to listen to your stories. Eventually, people emerge who seem to think like you, dress like you, and share your creativity, passion, and social concerns.
Socialization is important at every age. Researchers, like Rosemary Blieszner, tell us that “friendship is a relationship that can endure across the entire lifespan, serving a vital role for sustaining social connectedness in late life when other relationships may become unavailable.” (2019)
Copyright 2024 Rita Watson, MPH
