I struggled to have people listen to me or read my writing for many years.
As I wrote more and came out of my shell, certain things I did lead to positive responses.
Here are 8 subtle communication habits women are most attracted to in men, according to psychology:
1. Show empathy
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People are attuned to things that resonate with them. When you speak about a problem or challenge others can relate to, their ears will prick, and they will listen.
2. Use fine details
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Sweeping descriptions and vague concepts are like speaking in mumbles. People can’t see textures, and they want them. Be specific; use clear examples; add color sound, and touch. This amplifies the user experience.
3. Be courageous
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Ultimately, the best communicators are willing to go places few have the guts to. Say what few are saying. Turn up the heat. Call out those who need calling out. Don’t be needlessly offensive or crude; say what needs to be said in the right context. Courageous leaders build the most loyal following.
4. Repeat yourself
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Phrases, mottos, or ideas repeated at the right moments will add power to your communication, according to research from the Academy of Management. Repetition demonstrates belief in what you’re saying, and people will get behind this confidence.
I sometimes even re-write essential sentences in a text. This also applies to you showing up to communicate your ideas to the world, day after day. As someone once said: Repetition is persuasion.
5. Show you are human
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If you come across as too perfect or one-dimensional, people lose interest. Tell us your little struggles, and you will open up a part of you that is human. People will open up to you too. But don’t use a vague idea to skirt the discomfort of vulnerability. Be specific.
6. Showcase transformation
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People are looking to be inspired by what others have done successfully. This is why movies and stories told well are so successful. They feature a relatable character overcoming obstacles in pursuit of their goal and the change they experienced. Communicate these things, and people will hang on to your every word.
7. Say what you mean
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The best communicators often say things they don’t 100% know are true. But they amass loyal fans because they say everything like they know it’s true. It’s not what you say but how you say it that makes the difference.
Good communication is about demonstrating unwavering belief. If that’s absent, why would anyone trust you and take action in response to what you say?
8. Loosen your shoulders
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How uptight you are physically will have a very close bearing on the quality of your words, whether through writing or speaking. Having good posture will make you more confident, studies from the American Psychological Association show.
Few get this. We can inadvertently block our creative flow because we are wound up tighter than a tin toy truck. Take a breath, let go, lean into the uncertainty, and you’ll connect with a deeper intelligence. This will make people sit up and listen.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps people build money-making personal brands with their knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient.
