When you see your teacher at school everyday, it can be hard to remember that they are a real person with a real life too, just like you. And, like any other person, teachers deserve to be respected and have their boundaries acknowledged.
One set of parents had a difficult time understanding what exactly the meaning of boundaries was when they set out to visit their child’s teacher at her home.
A student’s parents showed up at their kid’s teacher’s house to meet her after missing open house.
A teacher shared the bizarre experience she had with the parents of one of her students at her own house on Reddit.
“So, it’s the Sunday night before school is about to start,” she stated. “I was relaxing in the living room with my partner, and we were watching TV with the window open.”
She explained that she was not exactly in any state for visitors. “I’m wearing a less appropriate dress that fits my personal style, not my work style,” she said.
“We hear a knock on the door. It’s a couple [of] strangers,” she continued. “They introduce themselves as the parents of one of my students.”
“They say they missed the open house, so they wanted to meet me now,” she said. “They also asked if we’d be willing to sell the camper on the side of our house.”
When asked how they found out where the teacher lived, they had an answer ready. “It’s a small town, so they said they found out their kid’s teacher is living here from a neighbor they are friends with, and they had seen the camper there for a long time since before we moved in,” she recounted.
According to the teacher, the situation could not have been more uncomfortable.
“We proceed to have a pretty awkward interaction as our puppy is barking at them, and the TV is still blaring,” she explained.
“I go barefoot to the side of the house to let them see the camper,” she said. “We explain how the camper belongs to the previous tenant and give them his number.”
The teacher can’t believe what happened and feels very awkward about all of it.
“I’m having pretty bad social anxiety from this interaction and still wrapping my head around the fact that parents just came over to my personal residence,” she told readers.
It’s important for teachers to set boundaries to protect themselves and their peace.
Writing for We Are Teachers, Christina Cawdery said, “Drawing clear boundaries is a much more difficult part of self-care practice that many people, especially educators, struggle with. Focusing on ourselves is already hard, but it’s especially hard in a profession whose culture is built around the concepts of service or, even, sacrifice.”
Cawdery argued that because teachers are so used to serving others, it’s easy for them to lose sight of themselves and become burnt out. This is what makes boundary setting so important.
“I had always seen boundaries as creating distance,” Cawdery said. “Instead, boundaries are a way of showing trust, care and confidence. Setting clear boundaries means that I not only trust them to respect me but that I trust myself enough to know what I actually need.”
This teacher on Reddit would benefit from setting boundaries.
By setting boundaries in this situation and telling the parents she was not comfortable talking to them at her home, this teacher could have saved herself from a very awkward and uncomfortable situation.
Commenters agreed, with one calling the parents’ actions “criminally inappropriate.” Another suggested, “You have to stand up for yourself, or they may do it again.”
Luckily, it’s not too late for the teacher to do so. She can still talk to the parents and tell them she is not comfortable with them visiting her home. Better yet, she can go to administration and have them deal with it, as some Redditors suggested.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.