When you’re a genuine person, you attract plenty of positivity. From the friends you have all the way to the partner you date, everyone you willingly surround yourself with inspires you.
However, there are downsides to being authentic, including being easily irritated. When you are honest with yourself, it becomes more difficult to hang out with certain types of people or be in specific situations.
Here are 8 things truly authentic people find irritating
1. Superficial conversations
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If you’re a genuine person, you likely hate superficial conversations. You like to go deep and despise surface-level nonsense. And you’re not to blame, because it’s ingrained in who we are. Research has shown that human beings are naturally wired for connection. Additionally, feeling connected improves our physical and mental health, including controlling blood sugar and body mass index.
When you’re in tune with who you are, you’re in tune with your natural human instincts. And sometimes that can mean being easily annoyed when someone asks about the weather, especially when you really just want to know who they are on a deeper level.
2. Gossiping
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There’s nothing authentic people hate more in this world than those who gossip. As a genuine person, gossiping about others is just flat-out mean, and you dislike the fakeness of it all. As a real person, you don’t see the reason for pointless gossip. If you have an issue with someone, you’d rather say it outright.
And that’s a good outlook to have. Because, as one study found, “High-frequency gossipers were perceived as less powerful and were liked less than low-frequency gossipers, and those who gossiped negatively were liked less than those who gossiped positively.”
3. People who over-apologize
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Authentic people apologize when they are wrong, but become frustrated when meeting individuals who over-apologize. It’s all too easy to spot an over-apologizer. They’re constantly saying, “I’m sorry,” for the smallest of things, even when the situation isn’t their fault.
And it’s not something that is sustainable. Not only does this annoy authentic people, but it can also make you be perceived as more weak and unconfident, according to one study.
4. A lack of compassion
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People who lack compassion tend to push away those with authenticity. As a genuine person, you thrive off getting to know others and finding commonality, showing empathy in order to form a lasting connection.
For you, it’s annoying to meet people who lack this ability. And, according to multiple studies, people who have bad character are less likely to be shown compassion or offered help. It’s a lose-lose for someone who lacks empathy, but a win for you, as it shows your authenticity.
5. People who don’t respect boundaries
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Setting boundaries is important for every person, but especially for authentic people. Believe it or not, genuine people are the most respectful individuals out there. It might seem hard to believe since authentic people come off as blunt, but just because someone is up-front doesn’t mean they’re disrespectful; it just means they want to assert their boundaries in a clear and concise way.
Boundaries are crucial for everyday life, affecting a person’s psychological well-being. And, according to Vanderbilt University, “people with less effective limits or boundaries are more likely to violate the boundaries of others.” If you’re an authentic person, it’s irritating to have someone blow through your boundaries with little regard for the consequences of their actions.
6. Dishonesty
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Authentic people live and breathe honesty, which is why a lack of integrity annoys them. Not only is dishonesty disrespectful, but it’s also fake. And studies have shown that dishonesty can impact our physical health as well.
One study found that “Lying, being selfish, cheating, and engaging in infidelity are associated with a suite of negative health outcomes,” including increased blood pressure and heart rate. So, not only is deception bad for your mental health, but your physical health as well.
7. Staying stagnant in life
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People who are authentic always look for ways to discover more about themselves. They tend to be more adventurous, as they live by their own set of rules and aren’t influenced by outside sources.
They understand that if you want to find yourself, you need to introduce yourself to new experiences. They know you need to get comfortable with the uncomfortable if you want to flourish. This is why they dislike people who live a stagnant life.
Genuine people simply can’t wrap their head around why others would want to be comfortable where they are, without the possibility of discovering something new.
8. Toxic positivity
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Yes, authentic people tend to be uplifting, but they aren’t clueless. If you’re this type of person, you understand what it took for you to get into this mindset. Likely, you’ve been through your fair share of challenges and heartache, but it’s only made you stronger and more resilient.
Unfortunately, people who exude toxic positivity tend to annoy authentic people, as they see this behavior as fake. And research shows that constantly being positive isn’t always a good thing. People who are shamed by people for not thinking positively often suppress their emotions, making them more preoccupied with those feelings with no way to overcome them.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor’s in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.